A rhetorical question obviously. Because we're not. Of course we're not. Just ask my children. If I haven't scarred them yet with all my yelling, I'm sure my exorcist voice will finish the job. The exorcist voice is generally reserved for my boiling point. My parental red zone, if you will. Exorcist voice = mean. low. slow. deadly. and perfectly articulated so as not to be misunderstood. For example, repeat after me:
"If you don't get your shoes on right now, I will give your DS to someone else who knows how to listen."
"If you don't go to bed right now, you can go sleep on the patio outside in the dark with all the bugs. I hope they don't bite you."
"If you don't want me to be your mom, you can go find someone else who will take you."
I realized I must say this last one quite a bit, because I overheard my children the other day after a heated run-in between me and L.
L: "I don't like Mom! I'm not her family!"
B: "That's fine, L. You don't have to like her, but that means you'll have to find someone else to take you. Good luck."
I'm sure this is not what Foster Cline and Jim Fay had in mind when they expounded on the importance of choices and consequences in Parenting With Love and Logic. Sadly, my parenting style is infused with a lesser (wo)man's patience, and my children are shortchanged in both love and logic.
10 comments:
Your posts always make me smile, Noelle, because I can totally relate! I think we all have an exorcist voice -- my kids know mine well!
i'm laughing just becuase you are not alone in this wild adventure they call motherhood and glad to know i' not either! i have several disturbed voices but i know i'm using it when me kids look at me like i've turned into some scary creature...probably not far off.
i love this post.
and i TOTALLY know your exorcist voice.
in fact, i have my own version.
i think having kids is too revealing.
it's like holding a mirror up to yourself.
or tape recording your vulnerable moments.
and having it played over and over again, when other people can hear.
when belén can start talking for real and goes to primary, i will probably avoid the primary teachers in the hallway, knowing they know too much : )
but on a hopeful note, maybe our mini-me's will mimic the good stuff too : ) thank goodness i yell TE AMO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! all the time and love-squeeze her too hard.
p.s I love this pic of everyone. even that grin on your face is so you. that "well... this is US, for better or for worse!" grin. with a cute dimple.
Umm, first what's with the perfect hair?! You shouldn't look that put together with 3 kids!
Second, I don't believe you!
P.S.
Makena feels the need to replicate exactly my tone and words daily to the boys. It makes me feel great about my parenting skills:) Then I have to yell at her for yelling at the boys.
You are so funny! I am taking parenting tips! And BTW, you are looking as beautiful as ever! What a darling family!
lol - i love it! Especially B saying good luck finding someone who will take L!
really, have you ever yelled? i've never heard you yell. seriously.
my favorite is when C is yelling at L and I yell at him to stop yelling. classic.
Noelle, I love you! I relate well to all the things you said, and your kids say. I used to try really hard to think about how would the proper parent say things or what would super nanny do?
Unfortunately I just say it like it is now, and think Super Nanny gets to leave her job at night. =)
Noelle -
since we are blessed with just dudes - we'd love to have little M in our life. if she is crazy she'd fit right in with the "Sherman Jr's". We are loud and proud, and our inside voice is a whispered outside voice. However, warn her that no one crosses Esther. She is the Queen of the Castle and we all know that. So whatever she says goes. So if she ever takes you up on your offer - we are in the beautiful climate of Wisconsin.
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